Gibbous a break!

I like to write a lot, I guess. I mean there are a lot of things that I write. Most of it is handwritten (I tell people I write everything by hand because I'm working on my handwriting... really it's just because I'm too cheap to get a computer). Those things usually get lost or just take so long that I never finish my thoughts and I eventually throw them away in dissatisfaction. I'm never able to write exactly what I'm thinking, either. I usually get too focussed on the aesthetics of what I'm writing that my thoughts get jumbled and robotic. What?! pretty handwriting is important to me. I have a journal (also handwritten) that I try to scribble things down in every so often, but for some reason, I'm unable to break free of the ridiculous/typical/"I'm being forced to write in my journal" format, so most of what I write embarrasses me at the thought of anyone else ever reading it. Earlier this year, I had a pocket-sized journal that I'd write thoughts in as they came to me. Being pocket-sized, I kept it in my pocket and wrote in it frequently enough to become proud of and somewhat attached to it. I lost it, and was so heartbroken about it that I couldn't get myself to pony up the $8 to buy another one. very frustrating. It's brown, leather, has a strap that wraps around it, and is riddled with secrets. if you find it, give it back. So, here I am, trying to solve all of my problems by appeal to the internet. I think everyone eventually comes to that conclusion these days. eHarmony.com. Chances are I won't write in this nearly as much as I intend to, but it's better than nothing.

I had always fancied myself a good writer. I think that's because I hadn't exposed myself to that much good writing. I have two brothers that I'm finding out more and more are amazing at it. Things like blogs have helped me realize this. I have a friend that has a blog that I casually creped upon the other day, and to put it simply, I was blown away. you should check it out: Robot Hearts. Not that I didn't expect it of her. I guess I'm just learning to be a lot less selfish and to focus on the amazing talents of my friends. That's how I'll put it so I can still take some of the credit. I think the only way I'll ever write as well as these people I admire so much is practice. Why not practice for the whole world to see? Delusions of grandeur. I doubt many people besides myself will ever look at this. I still think it's a good idea, or at least am in the process of convincing myself it is.